Till recently, I lived in a retirement home for four years in Vijayawada. I used to visit Hyderabad for a week, every month, to perform the monthly rituals for my dear departed husband. On one such trip, I met Lakshmi, my favourite niece, whose mother and I have been great friends for a very long time.

Lakshmi was looking for women to be a part of her dance drama, which was based on powerful female characters from Indian mythology. The show was scheduled for 8 March, International Women’s Day. Three of the characters had dropped out at the last minute, so she asked me if I could play Kunti, mother of the Pandavas. I developed cold feet and didn’t think I could do it.

Although I had been a teacher for more than 25 years and had been on stage with colleagues and kids, this was different. I would have to actually look at the audience and deliver my lines! Then Lakshmi said she would be reading out the parts and I would only have to make silent gestures according to the words. I was already feeling better.

We practised for a day and then it was time to go. When I saw the people coming into the auditorium, my nervousness resurfaced but I couldn’t back out at that point. Fortunately, it went off very well and I was pleasantly surprised when people clapped for me with great energy!

My life has come full circle, from being a typical Telugu housewife married at the age of 17 to acting in Lakshmi’s play. I have always loved music and dance but my father would not allow me to learn either. After I passed my Class 7, I was given away in marriage. Thereafter, it was my husband’s prerogative to decide whether I should learn any of the performing arts. My husband understood my desire and encouraged me to study some more. I did my Class 10 privately and then signed up for the five-year course to qualify for the Telugu Pandit exam from Nagarjuna University in Vijaywada, an official certificate that allows one to teach the language.

I could not learn dance but I did learn music and began to teach Telugu in small schools where my husband was posted, in and around Vijayawada. Teaching gave me the opportunity to explore music and perform on stage during annual day celebrations. When I look back, I believe it was my determination and my husband’s support that helped me make my life better. That same determination saw me through my initial stage fright during Lakshmi’s play.

After my husband retired, we chose to stay in a retirement home as he did not want to be a burden on our children. I have now decided to return to Hyderabad and stay with my son. I am in touch with friends; I am picking up on my love for reading holy books and other texts and gardening. A physiotherapist has given me some exercises and Lakshmi has added some easy ones too. I do these on a daily basis. I do not have any maids or any kind of help and do everything myself. This is how it was in the old-age home. Being physically and mentally engaged like this leaves me with no time to fret or worry.

—Leelavathi, Secunderabad

Photo: Shyamola Khanna
Featured in Harmony — Celebrate Age Magazine
July 2017