For all of March 2016, I felt my vision wasn’t quite all right in my left eye but the eye specialist couldn’t find anything wrong. Things came to a head when, while overtaking, I crashed the left bumper of my car into a parked taxi—I had simply not seen it! I got an MRI and later a biopsy, which revealed I had an aggressive tumor in my brain. My treatment would be a six-month course, and it included the works—chemotherapy, radiation and other treatments.

At a time like this, one banks on family and friends. I have no living family in India except my brother’s widow, Rekha, a teacher who lives in Delhi. My daughter lives in the US and was expecting her second child, so she was out of circulation. Rekha and a couple of friends came down from Delhi and bundled me off from my home in Hyderabad, saying the best oncologists were in the capital. Let’s face it, taking care of me was going to be a huge responsibility and Rekha, her friend Mani and my old friends Abha and Soma were absolutely wonderful. They worked out a schedule for the trips to the hospital and the time they would each be spending there.

In the last week of April, my chemotherapy cycles began. I had two mishaps when I went into septic shock and was knocked out for 48 hours. Finally, stem cell therapy was suggested and I agreed despite its low success rate. What did I have to lose?

After my last MRI on 26 October, the doctor smiled and said, “Go home; go get a life. You are free!” When I left Hyderabad in April, I knew my chances of returning home were minimal, and here I was being told I had a second chance at life! I believe Rekha, my friends and their families, who tended to me with so much love and patience, were in part responsible for the dramatic turnaround in my health. I stayed with Rekha, and although it did not register then, I later realised she had recently moved in with her ageing parents whom she took care of along with me.

Even before the chemo started, the tumour had started affecting me in odd ways. At times, I was lucid and at other times, I would wander into rooms looking for the toilet, picking up stuff randomly and then not knowing why I had done that. I would bump into things, stagger and collapse. I couldn’t gauge the position of a chair or the toilet seat, so I would fall down. Rekha was worried I would hurt myself, so she slept on the floor in my room to keep an eye on me. Her biggest fear was my going into the kitchen. While I let the tears flow, she told me more.

Gradually, as the tumour shrank and my health improved, Rekha and my friends helped me get back on my feet. The cancer had left but it had also taken away my confidence. Slowly, they let me do things on my own, always under strict supervision. According to Rekha, it was a great day when I made my first cup of tea on my own!

As if that were not enough, Rekha was generous with her praise for me. She says I was as cheerful as possible at all times, which helped my wonderful ‘team’ during the toughest periods. I want to mention that my friends in Hyderabad took over as soon as I got back from Delhi, and have offered all kinds of help, from food to trips to the local hospital. I never feel I am alone. I am also utterly grateful to the young people from a portal called bloodconnect.com. They responded as soon as Rekha posted a request. I was so moved by the humane efforts of all these people. These guys saved me and I shall be forever indebted to them!

—Roma Mathews, Hyderabad

Photo: Shyamola Khanna
Featured in Harmony — Celebrate Age Magazine
January 2017